The T.W.I.N.K.I.E.S. Project

The T.W.I.N.K.I.E.S. Project (Tests With Inorganic Noxious Kakes In Extreme Situations) is perhaps one of the best illustrated examples of the connection between the scientific mind and the art of pure silliness.

Apparently, this site was the result of "a series of experiments conducted during finals week, 1995, at Rice University." Which also demonstrates rather conclusively how productive a little applied silliness can be during periods of great academic stress. This observation, along with a bunch of burnt, soaked, pureed, shocked, crushed and microwaved Twinkies, is probably the most important of their findings.

Speaking of which, here's a summary of what they discovered:

• Twinkies don't burn well unless doused in alcohol. Then they make good fires.


• Twinkies in water expand to near twice their size and look really gross.


• When they are pureed Twinkies can be compressed much. Really mostly air.


• Do Twinkies conduct? Run lots of current through them. Very resistive.


• Dropped off of sixth floor Twinkies are not injured much. Just a small fissure.


• Microwaved Twinkies emit a great deal of smoke and smell very bad.