Ultimate Hoseball

The Hoseball, Son of Schmertlz, came into being as a direct result of the propinquitous ubiquity of both knee-high and thigh-high hosiery. A 2-3-sock sockball, stuffed into the toe of these hose forms, creates a thing to fling of such stretchy spinworthiness that it is oft likened to a weapon of soft, but nonetheless intimidating attribute. A well-flung hoseball, trailed spectacularly by its gauzy, wobbly, hose-formed tail, beckons every eye on the playground.

Thus, the inevitability of Ultimate Hoseball, a game, remarkably like the game of Ultimate Frisbee, but not with a wind-surfing frisbee, but a skyrocketing, filmy-tailed, ineffably catchable Hoseball.

Let's see, how do you play Ultimate Hoseball? In teams. Kinda like soccer, only without the kicking or the butting. Just with the throwing. And with the no-running-with-the-Hoseball rule, and the having to get it to a team member who is standing in the opponent's goal. You could have just two on a team, if you wanted. And three teams with three goals. And two hoseballs. Ultimately speaking.


from Bernie DeKoven, funsmith