Sports Inventors

Sports Inventors. They are meant to be a joke. You can even see how much of a joke they take themselvs as by watching their video.

But, you see, we who are the promulgators of Junkyard Sports, we know that such jokes are the very stuff, the very meat, the very core of new and meaningful paths to peaks of playful performance.

As in, for example, Bowling Shotput, as illustrated in the video.

Not to mention Lacrasticball, as also illustrated here.

I select but a few of my favorites from their collection of half-formed, undescribed, yet clearly inspired conceptual leaps:

• Crocockey - English croquet meets full-contact hockey.
• Darchery - extreme barroom darts played with a mini crossbow.
• Double Racketed Tennis - six-foot-long pole with a racket head attached to each end - doubles with half as many people.
• Escalator Surfing - the Zen of surfing balance performed while standing on a descending escalator step.
• Extreme Tetherball - three-tiered professional tetherball.
• Fat Abner - oversized baseball bat for easy contact. (After baseball inventor Abner Doubleday).
• Golfzilla - aggressive full-contact golf with running, blocking, tackling, and bigger holes for more hole-in-one's.
• Hackie Bag - beanbag chair-size hackie sack.
• Horseshoe Tag - players wear spiked helmets and try to ring toss one another.
• I Got It Mitt - oversized baseball mitt for the visually challenged.
• Jet-Ski Jousting - just like the medieval equestrian competition except played on jet skis.