Loving Fun

As fun as fun can be, as central as it can become to a healthy, healing relationship, it is remarkably hard to take seriously. Even though fun is the experience that binds, the purpose that shapes, the phenomenon that leads into and out of body, most organizations and institutions insist on pretending that fun has nothing to do with it. Even though, if they took it seriously enough, they could heal themselves and probably the world.

Here is a suggestion: give each other a weekend, a day, an hour devoted to fun – to thinking about fun, practicing fun, expanding your abilities to create and share fun with each other. In other words, to playing, games even – fun, funny, loving games that help you laugh and love each other – word games, walking around games, “pointless” games in which nobody keeps score, where the only point to playing is the loving fun we can give each other.

Play with each other, play with strangers and neighbors. Play games that make you want to play lovingly. Games that are fun, gentle, touching, safe, freeing, and in some very real, very unthreatening way, intimate.

In between games, talk about the fun you shared, the fun you created for each other, the fun that truly made you feel free, coliberated. And then, during the next game, see if you can bring each other more fun, liberate each other to some higher plane of fun.

Play some more. Love some more.


Of Fun and Flow the theory of loving fun
Intimate Fun from AHP Perspectives June/July 2000
Coliberation being better together
Love and Play cross-age, cross-ability, cross-species play
Of fun, laughter and happiness the connection


The competitve blessings game bless each other with fun
Long knives and the blue plate special spiritual eating
Food fun food games for lovers
Found object scrabble a restaurant game
Human spring think of it as contact calisthenics, with trust
Silly Little Loving Games: loving games for more than two

“Ask not what fun does for you, but what you do for fun!”

– The Oaqui*

Leave a Comment

This site uses inline comments. To the right of each paragraph, a comment bubble with a + sign appears when you click inside the paragraph. Click the bubble to load the comment form.