naughty fun

We first met naughty on the inner playground in 2003. And then, in the other playground,when we were contemplating what could or might be called the opposite of play.

When we’ve talked about fun in the past, we (royally speaking) divided the conscious universe into two parts:

the want to part being where the fun is. And then, of course, there’s the area of miraculous overlap, where the have to coincides with the want to, is probably where the fun is deepest.

There’s another factor to all this – the should do – which we find ourselves having to contemplate now that we’re talking about fun of the naughty kind. It looks like this:

Depending on the strength of one’s moral inclinations, the area of should do more often overlaps with the have to than the want to. And the area where all three overlap is where one might find sainthood.

Being naughty is fun because it makes you feel, however temporarily, free. You are heading towards the arena of pure want to – outside the boundaries of both have to and should do. Heading, but not quite there, because for naughty to be fun you have to be close enough to should do and have to to feel their frowning presence.

There are, of course, degrees of naughtiness, ranging from the cute to the criminal. Make, as they say, no mistake about it. Naughty fun is genuinely, and sometimes profoundly fun. But you have to be a little more careful with fun of the naughty kind. There’s not getting too naughty. And then there’s not getting caught.


  1. Doug Nathan on April 19, 2012 at 1:01 pm

    Bernie, I look forward to your blog posts every day. I know they bring depth and delight no matter what mood I’m in. And again, today, Silly and Serious, play on so many levels in your words, and in my life. Thanks for the awakening…again.

  2. Lily on May 5, 2012 at 10:58 pm

    This reminds me of your podcast about Silly and Serious, and having just enough of both.

    Love and laughter,

  3. lupus on May 16, 2012 at 2:47 pm

    What’s the difference between Should Do and Have to, from your point of view ?
    From mine, there is the Must Do, the Want To and the Should Do. The first representing the imperative needs we have, the second our pure will born out of passion, and the third what we listen from comon sense.
    I would agree with you that the fun goes deeper on the intersection of Must and Want, but I do not see how the Should would make the experience deeper.

    • Bernie DeKoven on May 16, 2012 at 3:10 pm

      Should, for me, is about morality – moral obligations, which can be externally or internally imposed, but generally have a certain, well, not quite “have to” but, on the other hand, if you do break them, you’ll be “bad” or feel bad about yourself. When you are fortunate enough to find something that is fun, and that lies at the intersection of want and have and should, then the fun, if not deeper, is at least freer. Guilt free, at least.

  4. lupus on May 17, 2012 at 10:00 am

    Ain’t it fun enough to eliminate guilt from yourself? I can say it is, from the my own experience.

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