On the Nature and Nurture
of The Oaqui Family Picnic
When We Eat
It's pretty much all the time. Eating is something
we pretty much do from the time we get there to the time we leave.
What We Eat
Actually, we taste.
We taste, for example, peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. Teeny
sandwiches, made from various combinations of any of five different
kinds of bread and six different kinds of peanut butter and several
more different kinds of jelly and jam, not to mention cream cheese
and celery.
And for dessert, we taste perhaps Smores. Five or four different
kinds of graham cracker, nine or eight different kinds of chocolate,
three or more different kinds of marshmallows. And perhaps even
a random assortment of jellies and peanuts butter.
Then there's the cookies and milk, the chips and the dips, the
crackers and the spreads, and the ice creams and pies.
While We Eat
We play games. Though of course no picnic is complete
without the traditional games of Oaquiball (from three-team
volleyball to one-team badminton), most of the games
we play are the games that we can mostly play while we're eating.
For example, there's your M&M** games: M&M
Checkers, M&M Table Olympics, M&M Fork Pass,
et, obviously, cetera. M&Ms have a special significance for
the Oaqui and are classified as semi-sacred candy-coated play
objects. Hence a great many of our games involve the gathering,
sorting, moving, stacking and flinging of M&Ms.
We also might play, for random example, the infamous card game
known variously as: Elephant, Elephant,
Elephant, and Rhinoceros, Rhinoceros, Rhinoceros,
and Elk, Elk, Elk.
First, we select three different cards, a king, say, a queen
perhaps and even a jack also. Then, as a group in consensus and
harmony, we decide on an animal name by which we will identify
that card. Thus, all kings become Elephants, Queens Rhinoceri
and Jacks, for example, Elk. Or any animal of such ilk.
The deck is placed face down. The first card turned over. And
the second turned over on top of the first, and the third etc.
If it is a named card, the first player to say that named card
aloud three times (saying, for example, "Elk, Elk, Elk")
gets that card and all the cards beneath it.
Now, to add intrigue, we might be using a double deck, or a pinochle
deck. To add complexity we might find new names for the ace, and
the ten, and the nine, and so on, even unto the three and two.
To add danger, we might even consider playing this during a cracker-and-peanutbutter
tasting. As you can imagine, this is an hilarious game to play
while one is eating, all choking aside.
Of course, during those lulls between moments of gagging and
hilarity, we might start singing a traditional Oaqui chant, naturally
making up the songs, and words, and instruments as we sing along.
Or, we might engage in the even more traditional practice of the
Oaqui Family Picnic Gift Exchange.
We pair off cross-generationally and make things to give to everyone
else. We make things out of candy and toothpicks, fabrics and
masking tape, bread and food dyes. Little love sculptures. And
then we give them to each other and then to everyone in the whole
Oaqui family. And then we exchange them with the greater Oaqui
family. Which often leads us to engaging in large scale construction
projects for the creation of Greater Oaqui family monuments, shrines,
and edible statuary.
How We Eat
We frequently make it the rule that we can't ask
for food or take for ourselves. In other words, we can only eat
what and when someone else offers us. It is exceptionally delicious,
being there for each other, at the right time with a forkful or
sipful or handful of just the right stuff.
Or, we each simultaneously reach for the taste of our choice,
and consume it utterly. We do this repeatedly until two or more
of us happen to fork the same item. The more forkers, the merrier.
For variety, we add more items Or, we might each try to select
the food that we think our partner wants, take a forkful, and
then try to feed each other simultaneously. To increase the challenge,
we might add reservoirs of condiments (bowls of whip cream, crushed
nuts, non-fat fudge), making taste-forking a two-stage operation.
Or we might actually forget the fork and use our fingers to feed
each other.
Then, when we are ready for our aftermeal (sic) snack, we sometimes
find ourselves playing the traditional game of Guess my Chew.
We prepare at least five or so finger foods, each with a different
crunch. For example: grapes, hard pretzels, ginger snaps, roasted
sunflower seeds, cheese nips, and garbanzo beans. We then momentarily
pick a partner. One of us puts an ear to the other's cheek. The
other takes a small piece of one of the foods, and chews as necessary.
The goal, if one is needed, would be to identify what is being
chewed, and perhaps how much of it, along with some estimate of
swallow duration. Or perhaps both of us chew at the same time
whilst simultaneously attempting to identify what the other is
eating. To make this game almost involuntarily amusing, we then
play in stereo: ear to ear, cheek to jowl, as a whole Oaqui family.
After We Eat
We clean up and leave. Usually together. Usually
unusually together.
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