Mother May I

1. In the Dentist Office - wherein I discover the Inner Playground: (mp3)
2. The Inner Playground - defined
3. My Inner Inner City
4. My Own Private Hollywood
5. Part Two: Games for the Inner Player
6. Freeze Tag
7. Mother May I
8. Simon Says
9. Part Three: Building an Inner Playground
10. The Inner Seesaw
11. My Inner Swingset
12. Part Four: Introducing Serious and Silly
13. Serious and Silly (mp3)
14. Kick the Can

I definitely like it best when it's my turn to be Mother. It's fun to be the one whose authority can be as absolute and as arbitrary as I want to make it.

"Mother, may I take two baby steps," asks my inner baby. Maternally speaking, I signal my permission. "May I take a giant step, perhaps, dearest mother," my inner giant inquires expansively. "Yes," I respond daringly, "you may." And he does. Only his giant step is just too giant for me, it gets him closer than I want him, and, when he's not looking, I promise myself not to let him take another giant step for the rest of the game.

"Mother, may I take another giant step," my inner giant inquires. "No you may not." "Mother, may I then take a monster step?" "No, you may not." "Well, how about a baby step?" You forgot to say Mother May I. Back to the start with you."

Sweet justice: just as I want it to be.

"Mother," asks the Funny me, funnily, "may I take a toilet paper roll step?" How could I not agree? Funny me lies on the floor and rolls almost to my feet. I am amused, and yet I can't help notice that Funny me is now the closest to me of any of me.

"Mother," brazenly trumpets Funny me, "may I take two baby ballerina steps." Baby ballerina steps in deed. Just too close.

"No," I reply, distantly, "but you may take one elephant step backwards."

And so on, and so on, Brave me. Good me. Wise me. Old me. Father me. Naughty me.  Entertainingly, ingratiatingly, inexorably moving closer. Each of me in its turn.

Until my chosen me reaches me, touches me, and makes me other.